ToPoJo #9

Beloved people of the world, we launched Tokyo Poetry Journal’s volume 9 (Gender/ Queer/ Here) last Friday night, featuring poetry readings, drag performances, and compulsory dancing. I read my translations of experimental, provocative and sexually ambiguous poetry talent, Mrs. Yoshihara Sachiko. Here is one of her impressive poems, my translation and a few pics of the event!

告白が

告白が終わった瞬間から
十字架は　あなたにうつった

＜さやうなら＞と　何度言ったか
＜こんどこそ＞と　何度言ったか

さうして　何度
むなしく　にがく　間違ったか—

コップを砕くのは
はじめてではない
赤い文字書くのも
はじめてではない！

いくつもの　くるしい別れを
すませてきたのは
終わりのないはじまりを
まだ信じ
探しつづけてぬたからだ

＜こんどこそ＞に賭けるたび
＜さやうなら＞をいけにへに捧げ
だんだんに
いけにへは肥り
神さまも肥り
わたしだけが貧しくなった
たったひとつのこされた　おそろしい貢ぎ物を
あなたは暗い瞳(め)で　ぢっとみつめる

さう　あの十字架もあなたにうつった
これからは
わたしの罪で　あなたが罰され
わたしの傷を　あなたがいたむ

—終りなく　それがはじまる

Confession is

The moment my confession was over
the Cross was reflected in you

How many times have I said sayonara?
How many times have I said now or never?
And how many
futile bitter mistakes have I made?

It’s not the first time
I break a glass
not the first time either
I write in red!

I got through with
so many farewells
all because I kept searching
believing
in a beginning without an end

Every time I bet on now or never
I offered my sayonara as a sacrifice
and gradually
my sacrifices grew fat
even God grew fat
only I turned needy
a single terrible tribute left behind
and your dark eyes staring it

Oh, yes another Cross is reflected in you
after this
you will be enslaved for my sins
you will be hurt with my pain

It is a beginning– without an end.